I came across this on Facebook from
David Foster - it is some well done satire. Here is, stolen in its entirety for your amusement.
A new political group, the Oak Bay Tea Party, is protesting plans to upgrade Oak Bay Avenue and several adjacent streets.
"No more socialized roadworks!" chanted a crowd at a recent town hall meeting.
"The ruts and potholes are really the only thing enforcing our speed limit of 20 kilometres per hour," said Pierce Plaumann, a local resident. "Most of our bylaw officers and traffic police are technically retired and couldn't drive faster than that if they tried."
The Tea Party has also launched a recall petition against Oak Bay-Wooden Head MLA Ina Dong.
Dong said the road upgrades were part of a provincial stimulus package but didn't have more specific information.
"You'll have to speak to the Minister of State for Highways and Byways," said Dong in between mouthfuls of chocolate truffle. "I honestly don't think the government is going to fall over a few smooth patches in the road."
However, Tea Party activist Francesca McGillicuddy calls Dong "hopelessly out of touch" with Oak Bay residents.
"Our current government has completely sold out to socialism and turned into another nanny state," McGillicuddy angrily asserts. "My ancestors built their homestead here in 1905 without any government intervention and that's the way it should be."
The Tea Party has started an initiative for a bylaw which would eliminate public works in Oak Bay. Streets would be divide into sections and each resident and business owner assume sole responsibility for maintaining the section of road adjacent to their property.
"People are self sufficient here and should be able to decide how they want their stretch of road to look," said Plaumann. "I like to keep plenty of moss growing on my patch so it matches my house."
Oak Bay mayor Kriss Fosston was trying to dig his car out of a snowbank in downtown Victoria and could not be reached for comment.
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